When you have to miss an important birthday because you live in China…
When you have to miss an important birthday because you live in China…
We are back in Shanghai and the opportunities for blog posts are piling up faster than I can write them down. First, let me begin by saying that our first few weeks back have had amazing weather. It is hotter than an oven with record-breaking temperatures, but the air quality has been amazing. Seriously amazing. Remember when the pollution levels were up in the two and three hundreds? One morning when we woke up, they were measuring the pollution levels as an eight. An eight!!! Let me give you an idea of the difference:
It made it almost bearable to be back in China again after our summer adventures. As one neighbor explained, “If you just don’t look down, you can forget you are in China!” Just focus on the sky, people!
True to form, the kids all caught some sort of horrible disease as soon as we landed. Most likely we got it on the plane, but does that even really matter at this point? There was plenty of coughing and sniffling and we almost broke out Lucas’ nebulizer. Henry was the last to fall, finally developing a horrible headache on Sunday that required our house full of friends to cut their epic battle short. In the middle of the night he was up again with a headache and slight fever. He threw up the medicine I gave him and he and I spent the remainder of the night in the living room. I kept him home from school the next day and he seemed to rally. Predictably, when the question of returning to school came up he was adamant that he was still extremely ill. He even thought he might have strep throat. It hurt to swallow! He couldn’t eat! Oh, the pain! I was skeptical. He insisted that I examine his throat and once I managed to find a working headlamp (don’t ask) I was surprised to find that his throat was red, swollen, and disgustingly splotchy. In fact, it perfectly matched the Internet illustration of strep throat.
So the next morning we visited our Chinese pediatrician’s office. There was a new doctor, of course, since we have yet to see the same person there more than once. The nurse gave me the new doctor’s card and explained that Dr. Pu would most likely be around for a while. I waited for Henry to notice that his new doctor had such an interesting name, but he had no reaction. None! Here was the perfect joke for a 6 year old boy and he was missing opportunity after opportunity. Dr. Pu was a Chinese woman who proceeded to listen to Henry’s laundry list of complaints. She took the time to belch loudly in the middle of questioning him about the duration of his sore throat. No apology, no discussion, no pause even. Her bedside manner is second to none, obviously. After diagnosing Henry with a sinus infection she berated me for even suspecting strep. His throat would look much worse! Consider his symptoms! I didn’t mention that I had consulted WebMD before making the appointment although I suspected she might have done the same. Her description of the illness seemed to be lifted word for word from the website. She refused to do any sort of test to make sure it wasn’t strep and then confided that if it was strep the antibiotics she had prescribed would knock that out as well. She also told me that Henry didn’t need to actually finish the medicine– a different powder for me to mix this time!– and then gave me some convoluted explanation of the number of days worth of medicine he was to take depending on how he felt. All very scientific. But I would never second guess Dr. Pu. (Snicker, snicker.) She is a professional.
After school one day, Henry greeted me at pick up time with a package. It was a “snack” he had been given by a friend and he needed help opening it.
Notice that the package clearly states that this “snack” is sea vegetable. Roasted seaweed! There is even a photo, albeit somewhat misleading, that plainly shows the contents to be green. I pointed this out to Henry who responded to my concern with the famous Erickson eye roll and an impatient, “I know!” Never one to miss out on the chance to watch my children suffer, I promptly tore the wrapper open and waited for the inevitable. Would he spit it out? Fall to the ground and writhe around in agony? Beg for a drink to wash the foul taste from his delicate American tongue? Instead, this happened:
And some of this:What!? It seems that Henry likes sheets of roasted seaweed! Who knew? “I eat this all the time,” he informed me before dismissing me with a wave of his grubby little fingers.
Later, at home, Ava spied the empty package. “You bought this for Henry?!” she accused. “No fair!” Hello, this is SEAWEED, children. Sea VEGETABLE, no less! Apparently Ava has been eating it all the time, too. On purpose.
“It really is delicious, Mom,” Lucas chimed in. “Crunchy and salty. You can’t go wrong with that.” Lucas has been sampling roasted seaweed as well. With gusto. And all of this without me having any idea. I had absolutely no knowledge of this new favorite snack. They come home from school requesting “those Korean dried noodles” and wanting “fairy bread” for their birthdays. Who are these little citizens of the world?
It is almost Chinese New Year and that means it is time for Henry to dazzle us all with his kung fu skills! He has been taking kung fu after school for a while now and was excited to get a chance to show off his moves during the school performance. Allegedly this routine originally had the song “Kung Fu Fighting” as the accompanying music. I have no proof of this and I am so sorry to report that for the actual performance they used some more generic Chinese music.
They performed twice and the first video I shot includes mainly the backs of other people’s heads. It is just like the pirated DVDs we can get here! While I am sure you all would have enjoyed watching Henry through the crowd of other parents, I managed to slide closer for the second show. Please excuse the giant pole that blocks his floor moves! My video skills could use some work, obviously. The best part of the performance occurred when the kids took the stage and the children in the audience from Henry’s class started calling out, “Henry! Henry!” I don’t think I captured that on film, but you might get to see his dismissive wave as he walks to his spot. Stars have no time for the commoners, you know.
I like being back in China. But when I got home I felt like I wanted to go back on vacation. Then I could play video games. The boat was my favorite part of vacation because we could play video games all day. I like being on the boat just because it is fun and we swim, go to the beach, and go snorkeling. I saw a sunken ship. I saw fish and two barracudas.
Dictated to Gwen by Henry
I wish Daddy was here. Like in the olden days.
Dictated to Gwen
We are going to see a lot of great things. I wish that we could stay in Baltimore.
My friend Rufus
Is a doofus
And he likes
Sharp spikes!
I am excited to move to China. I am glad I get to bring my dog, Maggie. I love Maggie.
Dictated to Gwen